The first big dating tip that I constantly remind women of, is that men can also be a bit shy and need encouragement. I tell women in the dating service that they have his phone number and should just pick up the phone and call them too. Men absolutely love that because it makes them feel remembered and thought of.
The 2nd tip is that you should not treat a date as a “Spanish Inquisition”. Focus on getting to know each other naturally so that there is a higher chance of a second date.
The 3rd tip, and probably one of the most important ones is “Do NOT talk about your ex” or current husband, ex boyfriend or about your late alimony payments. This is just a big no-no when it comes to dating. We all have baggage and it isn’t important, especially in the 1st date situation, to know about your past especially when it involves an ex. The other person will quickly thing, “Why the hell are we even on a date right now then… you seem to be hung up on them still.” No one needs to know about the last man or woman that did you wrong because it’ll make them think that they don’t want to get involved past the 1st date with someone that can be so focused on the negative instead of the positive (i.e. the opportunity to meet someone new and move on).
The 3rd tip is that you should clear your mind and leave the past in the past. Focus on the future and the positive opportunities ahead. Clear your mind and shut the door of so that negative things don’t come up during a first date or during conversation. It’ll come across and it might be the dealbreaker between asking for a 2nd date or even being asked to the 1st date.
The 4th tip is to be HAPPY because it is contagious and people enjoy being around other happy people. Debbie Downer’s are rarely seen hanging out with a group of people much less in dating situations… because no one wants to be around a downer.
The 5th tip where a lot of people fall apart after a couple of great dates is to not be afraid of it working. Some people are scared of “relationship success” and can sabotage a great connection. Don’t focus too much on how you won’t have as much solo time, or now you’ll have to check in with your significant other. Focus on the 12 months down the road or 5 years down the road. If you can still see yourself with them because you are truly compatible, you shouldn’t be afraid of putting in work to make the relationship work and last. Everything good in life requires hard work because everything good is worth it. Remember that everyone wants a best friend and someone that cares for them in a relationship. Focus on building a solid friendship that will make sure that he and she always have your best interests and that you have their best interests at heart at all times. If you wouldn’t do something bad to your best friend but don’t feel bad about doing it to the person you are dating, then perhaps you need to re-evaluate.
The 6th, and last tip, is to learn how to communicate your thoughts and feelings. If you don’t ask, you can’t receive. In worse cases, you can find yourself in uncomfortable situations such as being dragged out to a loud sports bar when you actually enjoy a quiet dinner instead. If you don’t speak up about what you like, want, and expect then you can’t expect the other person to magically read your mind.
Speaking up earlier will also set the patterns in place and might even help you figure out if the person is even right for you sooner instead of later. Don’t waste time dating someone that isn’t a fit because you never expressed yourself.